Not Me! Monday - Travel Edition

Not Me! Monday was created by MckMama at MckMama.com. Hop over to her blog to see what she, and everyone else, has not been doing this week too.
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It's Monday again and -- brace yourself -- it's a long one. Last week we traveled to Arizona to visit family. We had a great time hanging out with everyone -- and created lots of fodder for this Monday post.

Without further ado:

Matthew did not announce "I have to go potty!" just as our plane was about take off. Once we were in the air and free to move about the cabin, we did not wait to change him out of his wet clothes because 1.) Matthew seemed oblivious to his condition and 2.) Nolan had fallen asleep in my arms, on the aisle seat, and we didn't want to risk waking our thankfully-asleep-for-the-flight baby.

We lived up to the boy scout motto and were thoroughly prepared for flight with two small children. In other words, we brought a lot of stuff. When Nolan seemed thirsty, we popped open the flip-top straw on one our sippy cups to give him a drink of well-prepared water. The contents were not UNDER PRESSURE and the water did not EXPLODE out of the straw, RIGHT INTO BOB'S EYE. As I struggled to re-close the spout, I did not get soaked with my fair share of water as well.

Our preparedness somehow lapsed in the area of swim diapers. When the pool nazi demanded a swim diaper, I am very honest and always on the up-and-up, so I would never have called my mother-in-law to ask her to grab one of Matthew's bedtime pull-ups. I wouldn't have slipped the too big pull-up on my baby and called it a swim diaper. Nope, not me. After hours of joyful water play under the Arizona sun, the super-absorbant jellylike contents did not explode out of the swelled up diaper, all the way up Nolan's back. I was not chatting with the pool guard on duty as I shook all the jelly crumples out of Nolan's shirt, pretending like nothing unusual was going on. Matthew did not think it was the funniest thing ever and giggle his head off.

We have minimal countertop in our small kitchen, so I struggle to use our bumpy gas stovetop as make-shift counter space on a regular basis. When we arrived at Bob's parents home, I did not have a moment of envy for their nice flat, black electric cooktop. Oooh, I thought, their stove would make such a nice counter. When the kitchen got crowded while making Matthew a PB&J a few days later, I did not hastily try out my theory. The burner had NOT just been used and was not still extremely warm. My nose was not alerted by chemical fumes that something was drastically wrong. I did not melt a plastic plate and a Jif jar to my in-laws nice black cooktop! I did not, for the rest of our visit, feel like a complete idiot every-single-time I looked at the stove -- their nice, flat, black, now plastic-crusted, stovetop.

On the return flight, we were again well-prepared. When one of the kids was thirsty, I grabbed our water bottle and flipped it open. I did not completely forget about the PRESSURE issue again. Water did not forcefully shoot out of the straw, raining down water on a man two rows in front of us. I did not laugh hysterically for far too long, instead of looking properly contrite, as water dripped from the ceiling and seat backs all around us.

Upon returning home, Matthew was not still on Arizona time and did not have an awful time falling asleep. It did not take him until after eleven to finally conk out. Shortly after Bob and I went to bed, we heard a loud clunk. It was not Matthew's face smashing into his nightstand as he fell out of bed. And he did not bust his lip open. And it was definitely not the NIGHT BEFORE SCHOOL PICTURES.

This week, after several lessons in why we don't want to pee in the tub, Matthew did not stand up in the bathtub, grab a cup and pee into it. I did not say, "Well, that was resourceful."

And lastly, later this week, when Matthew desperately needed to use the potty, but they were both occupied, I did not hand Matthew a cup and say, "Here you go."

Gasp. Not me.

Now it's your turn to make me feel better, what have you not done this week? Anyone?